Book Promo: Please See Us

Please See Us

by Caitlin Mullen

Summer has come to Atlantic City but the boardwalk is empty of tourists, the casino lights have dimmed, and two Jane Does are laid out in the marshland behind the Sunset Motel, just west of town. Only one person even knows they’re there.

Meanwhile, Clara, a young boardwalk psychic, struggles to attract clients for the tarot readings that pay her rent. When she begins to experience very real and disturbing visions, she suspects they could be related to the recent cases of women gone missing in town. When Clara meets Lily, an ex-Soho art gallery girl who is working at a desolate casino spa and reeling from a personal tragedy, she thinks Lily may be able to help her. But Lily has her own demons to face. If they can put the pieces together in time, they may save another lost girl—so long as their efforts don’t attract perilous attention first. Can they break the ill-fated cycle, or will they join the other victims?

Evocative, eerie, and compelling, Please See Us is a fast-paced psychological thriller that explores the intersection of womanhood, power, and violence.

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Review

“Please See Us is riveting, the rare book that unpacks and deplores violence against women even as it depicts it. In Caitlin Mullen’s hands, everyone has a voice, and the dead speak as loudly as the living. Please See Us is a beautifully written, thoughtful page-turner, as well as a tribute to the women— not just victims, but full human beings—who so frequently go unseen.” (Chloe Benjamin, New York Times bestselling author of The Immortalists )

About the Author

Caitlin Mullen earned a BA in English and creative writing from Colgate University, an MA in English from NYU, and an MFA in fiction from Stony Brook University. While at Stony Brook, she taught undergraduate creative writing, served as an editor and contributing writer for The Southampton Review, and worked as a bookseller at WORD in Greenpoint. She grew up in upstate New York and the Jersey Shore and currently lives in Brooklyn. Please See Us is her debut novel.

HEART OF MALENESS (on-sale 1/28/20)

French philosopher & sociologist Raphael Liogier
responds to #MeToo with “incisive critique
of the Western cultural construct of maleness”

Philosopher and sociologist Raphaël Liogier has closely followed the staggering outpouring of accounts of sexual harassment and rape from the many women’s voices that comprise the #MeToo movement.  Compelled by the movement’s importance, and fueled by a personal sense of disgust and dismay, Liogier draws on his academic expertise to lay bare the pernicious and disturbing logics at the core of gender in equality in HEART OF MALENESS: An Exploration (Other Press Paperback Original; On-Sale January 28, 2020). In the brazenness of Donald Trump, who brags about groping women, in the hypocrisy of outspoken progressives whose private behavior belies their so-called feminist ideals, and even occasionally in the good intentions of men such as Liogier who strive to be allies, we discover the influence of a deep-seated fantasy of male dominance. Conscious of his position as a white, affluent, heterosexual, cisgender male, Liogier does not engage with #MeToo through the privilege of a false sense of distance nor does he attempt to speak for women. Instead, Liogier uses his own distress, self-questioning, and academic training to dissect the contradictions guiding men’s perceptions of women. HEART OF MALENESS anatomizes the cultural imagination that shapes misogyny, demonstrating how stunning inequalities are sustained through common perceptions and everyday behaviors that rest on long histories.

With candor and sharp-edged clarity, Liogier demonstrates how the archetypal Prince Charming and a serial predator like Harvey Weinstein are two sides of the same coin – products of a worldview that not only places men’s desires above women’s, but also fundamentally doubts that women are even capable of knowing what they want. From the heroes of fairy tales and epic quests that “rescue” passive women, to the public catcallers and men who feel justified in pursuing women who have turned them down, the fantasy of male dominance recurs over and over again as a denial of women as free subjects in the philosophical sense.  Liogier makes visible the contemporary influence and damaging impact of the powerful and prevalent fiction that the free will of women is somehow incomplete, that their modes of expressing their will are always somehow deficient, and that their own desires remain a mystery to them.

Recent years have witnessed significant progress toward gender equality, from the ousting of prominent men accused of sexual misconduct to the unprecedented popularity of the 2019 Women’s World Cup. HEART OF MALENESS maps out the crucial work still to be done, first and foremost by addressing the core male fantasy about women’s bodies and minds.

HEART OF MALENESS: An Exploration
By Raphaël Liogier; Translated by Antony Shugaar
Other Press Paperback Original • ISBN: 9781635429930
On Sale Date: January 28, 2020 • Price: $14.99

pre-order this book
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Zeebra Books

“What Liogier has done here is to begin the long and arduous process of unknotting generations’ worth of thought, experience, and manipulation that have created a system of power and inequality that endangers all of us. It’s no easy task, but as Heart of Maleness shows, the dangerous and profoundly unfair status quo of gender must be reassessed, reexamined, and deconstructed, and ultimately replaced. This is an incredibly important beginning.”
— Jared Yates Sexton, author of The Man They Wanted Me to Be: Toxic Masculinity and a Crisis of Our Own Making

Book Review: Reimagining Women’s Cancers by Dr. Mark Boguski, Dr. Michele Berman & David Tabatsky

Celebrity Power Plus Public Awareness Is Changing
Lives In Reimagining Women’s Cancers

“The illnesses of famous patients receive enormous attention from the media and serve as touchstones for patients and families dealing with similar conditions… By taking a series of famous cancer cases and looking at the actual information being received by the public, Doctors Boguski and Berman are furthering the important process of ascertaining exactly what these episodes teach us.”

–– Barron H. Lerner, MD, PhD, Professor of Medicine and Public Health, New York Presbyterian, The University Hospital of Columbia and Cornell, Author of When Illness Goes Public: Celebrity Patients and How We Look at Medicine

“Thank you for sharing the relationship between celebrity health conditions, consumer Internet search behavior, and its potential for developing teachable moments for the advancement of public health.”

–– Nan M. Laird, PhD, Harvey V. Fineberg, Professor of Biostatistics, Harvard School of Public Health

Cancer doesn’t have to be a death sentence. The get-out-of-cancer-free card? Prevention through information. The recent World Cancer Report from the World Health Organization states that about half of all cancers are preventable and can be avoided if current medical knowledge is better delivered. From People magazine, with a readership of 43 million to Internet sites like JustJared.com with over 80 million monthly views, celebrity information not only sells, it has the ability to educate about important issues––including cancer.

Whether readers are currently patients or consumers wanting to be better informed, Reimagining Women’s Cancers exemplifies that information is empowering. Reading about a famous person coping with cancer can not only be inspiring, it can save a life. In this first book of their Reimagining Cancer series, doctors Mark Boguski and Michele Berman team with writer David Tabatsky to provide celebrity stories focusing on cancer of the breasts, ovaries, uterus, cervix, vagina and vulva.

To provide readers with critical information to help them manage, cope, and recover from illness, Reimagining Women’s Cancers is written in an easy-to-read style and format. Each chapter begins with basic anatomy concerning each cancer, followed by an overview of how we view a particular cancer today. The chapters flow easily into an explanation of signs, symptoms, diagnoses, scientific information and guidelines, and end on comprehensive surveys for treatments and prevention. Woven throughout are stories, both medical and anecdotal, from women such as Angelina Jolie, Joan Lunden, Melissa Etheridge, Sandra Lee, Rita Wilson, Christina Applegate, and Suzanne Somers.

Every 23 seconds someone in America is diagnosed with cancer. Education is the key, and by using clear and concise information by means of celebrity stories, Reimagining Women’s Cancers can teach countless readers who might otherwise not pay attention to an epidemic likely to affect them or a loved one.

About The Authors

Dr. Mark Boguski and Dr. Michele Berman are a husband and wife team of physicians who have trained and taught at some of the top medical schools and research institutions in the country, including Harvard, Johns Hopkins, Washington University in St. Louis, the National Library of Medicine and the National Institutes of Health. Celebrity Diagnosis, the website they founded and launched in 2009, is now featured as an integral part of the American Association for Cancer Research website and combines celebrity health conditions with up-to-date medical information on numerous cancers. Through their website, Dr. Boguski and Dr. Berman have created numerous “teachable moments in medicine,” giving the medical facts behind the headlines. Their aim is to increase health awareness and medical knowledge for patient empowerment and professional development, and raise the likelihood of consideration for early detection and preventative behavior.

For a patient facing cancer, or for a medical student overwhelmed by data, medical information alone can be quite daunting and often misses out on the human factor that is so vital in prevention and healing. David Tabatsky, through his writing and editing, has added an essential element to the book through his interviews with patients and cancer support groups, as well as by making the book easy to read.

Tweet: @MarkBoguskiMD
3700 followers on LinkedIn
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/end-ovarian-cancer-mark-boguski

Reimagining Women’s Cancers: The Celebrity Diagnosis Guide to Personalized Treatment and Prevention
HCI Books
Available online everywhere and at https://www.amazon.com/Reimagining-Womens-Cancers-Personalized-Prevention/dp/075731953X
ISBN 9780757319532

More praise for Reimagining Women’s Cancers:

Kristi L. Holmes, PhD, Director, Galter Health Sciences Library at Northwestern University, Feinberg School of Medicine: “As an educator striving to effectively convey key points in a lecture, including a celebrity facet with other examples makes it easier for our students, trainees, and faculty to work through very complex concepts in a fun way… I am able to use the resource in a professional capacity within the library as well in my courses and workshops on various topics related to genomic medicine and biomedical research.”

“MedPage Today found that since launching Celebrity Diagnosis on our site, page views have risen faster than any other blog we carry. We believe it’s because celebrities attract attention as a jump-off point to educate. You have found a unique niche.”

Turning Off Stress, Inviting in Tranquility and Inspiration

Turning Off Stress By Inviting Tranquility And
Inspiration In With The Simple Act Of Coloring

Just when a sympathetic heart seems like it can’t take anymore, reach for something to help quiet the mind and ease the soul. Inkspirations coloring books for adults offer a way to turn off negativity while healing the spirit. Art therapy has long proven its effects as an aid in emotional and mental restoration, and it is not news that coloring as active meditation reduces stress and quiets thoughts. However, from the original publishers of Chicken Soup for the Soul now comes a line of coloring books ready to encourage, inspire, and help worries fade.

Whether coloring with friends, family, or on your own, it doesn’t take much to color your day a little brighter. With moving quotes alongside unique and graceful images, Inkspirations coloring books include a wide array of themes to help express creativity and enjoy therapy through coloring. To start overcoming heartache, releasing tensions, and building positive energy, readers can visit the new Inkspirations website, www.Inkspirations.com.

The website is a reader’s portal to a more colorful world, giving a peek at the wide spread of unique pages Inkspirations has to offer, and some highly anticipated releases.

On coloring lists now:

•    Inkspirations in the Garden (June 2016)

Anyone blessed with a green thumb knows that a garden is nature’s haven, and when properly tended can transform a patch of ground into a place of splendor that abounds with intoxicating colors, scents, and wildlife. Inkspirations in the Garden celebrates gardens in all their glory, from images of delightful cottage gardens to well-manicured rose gardens, from lush tropical gardens to relaxing Zen gardens. The original designs feature exquisite floral patterns to color and customize, plus heartwarming scenes of loveable backyard critters, like ladybugs and bumblebees, and even the squirrels and rabbits who sometimes become our garden nemeses. Inkspirations in the Garden pays homage to those who make weeds into wonders and have been enriched by gardening’s lessons about a life well-tended and nurtured. Please visit: http://amzn.to/21nxZQS

•    Inkspirations Animal Kingdom (June 2016)

For coloring enthusiasts looking for inspiration, nature provides a dazzling array of colors and patterns – the bold black stripes on a tiger’s back, the kaleidoscope of teals in a peacock’s plumes, the fiery orange of a fox’s coat, or the rainbow of colors in a macaw’s feathers. Now you can add your own burst of color with Inkspirations Animal Kingdom, which showcases more than thirty beautifully detailed designs of a menagerie of animals large and small. Paired with inspiring quotes and heartfelt lessons we humans can learn from our animal counterparts, this book will uplift and inspire whether you are an avid colorist or an armchair explorer. For information, please visit: http://amzn.to/1Q6oUen

Also see www.Inkspirations.com for:

•    Inkspirations for Women (March 2016)
•    Inkspirations for Recovery (February 2016)

Coloring to come:

•    Inkspirations for a Happy Heart (June 2016)

Sharing more than 30 original designs to make your own, plus motivating mantras to help you relax, unwind, and greet each day with renewed optimism and creative energy. Whether you’re new to coloring or a gel-pen aficionado, you may have already admired the artistic creations of Diane Yi, whose stunning artwork has been shared, pinned, or colored around the world. With Diane’s style of intricate details with exquisite flourishes, Inkspirations for a Happy Heart provides a perfect canvas that will inspire you to color your world a little brighter. Please see: http://amzn.to/28G4xLo

●    Inkspirations for Cat Lovers (July 2016)

Cats are curious, regal, intelligent, and playful. They oblige us humans by allowing us to share our lives and hearts with them. Inkspirations for Cat Lovers celebrates the magic, mystery, and merriment of cats throughout the seasons, from Siamese to the Sphynx, Abyssinians to Persians, Maine Coons to calicos, and more. From long-haired to short-haired and everything in between, you will find more than 30 original designs that celebrate the many ways in which cats bring joy (and fur!) into our lives. Inkspirations for Cat Lovers is a fitting tribute to our whiskered companions who color our world brighter every day. Please see: http://amzn.to/1PuN3G7

For more information, please contact Kim Weiss at (800) 851-9100 ex. 9212, or kimw@hcibooks.com.

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Fitness Program for Women

 

Are Women’s Fitness Programs Outdated?
Celebrity Trainer Says Most Women Benefit From A Comprehensive Approach 

A study indicating why British women don’t workout as much as they’d prefer surely reflects the sentiments of American women, says celebrity trainer Holly Perkins.

The research revealed that 75 percent of women in the United Kingdom want to exercise more, but they’re discouraged for fear of being judged by others. The women surveyed worried about how they would look while exercising in front of others, their inexperience in personal fitness and the idea that they’re putting themselves first, ahead of their children.

“Whether she’s a stay-at-home mom, a busy executive or somewhere in the middle, these are concerns most women have about fitness,” Perkins says. “I believe this reflects their self-image, and it’s a shame that so many women live their lives short-changing themselves.”

Even today, most fitness programs women come across neglect important parts of the average woman’s mindset, she says. Many gyms have spinning and other classes targeting women, but they lack the comprehensive aspect so many women are searching for, she says.

“There are plenty of women who frequent gyms, but I think the culture of most of those places are framed by a male-dominated attitude, which is more comfortable blocking out ‘gym time’ in their schedule,” says Perkins, who recently released a home-exercise system designed specifically for women called baladea (www.baladea.com), with regimens she developed to fuse fitness and wellness exercises.

“I believe a woman’s attitude craves a more holistic approach, one in which overall well-being is factored into a how-to lifestyle program.”

Perkins describes what works for women in a fitness program.

•  Fun. “No pain, no gain” is definitely a man’s attitude. As women, we are not afraid of a healthy muscle burn, sweating and commitment – we’re designed to carry babies for nine months, and then deliver them, after all. However, we are much more relationship-oriented, and we thrive in positive feelings. The way to a woman’s heart in fitness is fun.

•  Purpose. For men who workout, the activity is almost a purpose in itself. There is a sense of accomplishment in lifting heavy weights and “gettin’ it done.” Women want to shine; we want to look and feel like we never felt possible. We want to be in touch with who we are, and fitness synergized with overall well-being can do that.

•  Steps. It’s good for anyone starting a fitness program to have a blueprint for what they’d like to achieve, and steps for improvement along the way. For those who are inexperienced, an introduction and detailed plan enables time for the mind to ease into the process. Confusion or uncertainty is a waste of energy, and implementing new workout phases allows women to maximize our effort.

•  Synergy. If you think women don’t need weights, think again. Resistance band training increases your power and revs your body’s fat-burning engine. We also want to be lithe, supple and physically elegant. Yoga helps us reshape trouble zones, and something I call “flow” optimizes flexibility and beautifies posture. And, when we are done, we can enjoy a calm that reinforces our motive for inner and outer beauty, leaving us with an energizing relaxation.

About Holly Perkins

Holly Perkins is a national fitness expert and developer of baladea (www.baladea.com), a customizable fitness and wellness system for women. She holds a bachelor’s degree in Exercise Physiology and is a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist (CSCS), one of the most prestigious certifications in the industry. She believes that making fitness a fun lifestyle is the best way to achieve true change. As one of the nation’s leading weight-loss experts and a highly sought-after celebrity trainer, she has been featured in numerous magazines, newspapers and on national TV shows.

Women & Their Financial Future

5 Steps Women Should Consider Making to Take Control of their Financial Future

When it comes to women and money, there is some good news, says Lance Drucker, ChFC, CLU, a veteran financial professional.

On average, women are more independent and financially literate than ever before, he says. On the other hand, Prudential’s eighth biennial study titled Financial Experience & Behavior Among Women recently revealed that women are no more likely to make sound financial decisions today than two years ago – or even when the study began 10 years ago.

“When women are more involved with their own finances, they feel more in control of their independence and are generally happier, but many seem to suffer a disconnect between what they want in their financial future and their spending habits,” says Drucker, CEO and president of the New York City-based Drucker Wealth Management, (www.DruckerWealth.com), a firm that specializes in empowering women to make sound financial decisions.

“While most American women say having enough money to maintain their lifestyle throughout retirement was very important, only 14 percent of those polled said they were very confident that they’d achieve that goal.”

Drucker, author of “How to Avoid Bag Lady Syndrome (BLS): A Strong Woman’s Guide to Financial Peace of Mind,” offers some guidance on the steps women can take to help them not only feel empowered about their money, but actually take control of their financial future:

•  Figuring out the cause of your Pain: Too many women really don’t want to look too deep as to why finances cause them so much stress – kind of like not getting on a scale because we really don’t want to see how much we weigh.  Before we can come up with a solution to your financial problem, we need to figure out what the problem actually is: lack of income, growth, financial illiteracy…

•  Budgeting vs. Louis Vuitton handbags.  We all need to do or buy things that make us feel good, but we need to factor our indulgences into our overall life plan. Establishing a necessary budget (what we need just to get up in the morning) as well as an Aspirational budget (more of a wish list) will help guide your decision-making process as to what you can or can’t afford to do (including buying that “to die for” item).

•  “I don’t know what I have;” Why a Balance Sheet is essential: Too many times our women clients have no idea what they have as far as financial resources, how their assets have performed, and how much they are paying for someone’s help.  Creating a balance sheet, collecting all of your statements, and taking an accounting of your life gives you the data to start making smart decisions.  

•  Developing a Plan vs. the Wine and Dark Chocolate approach: Hoping things will just get better, or the chocolate-and-wine approach to life, does have its benefits (as my wife has explained to me on numerous occasions).  Developing a written plan that lays out what you want financially and when you want it goes a long way toward peace of mind.  The wine wouldn’t hurt while writing the plan though.

•  The Gym Commandoes: There are two types of people who succeed at the gym: those do-it-your self folks who walk around with a little notebook like Rainman tracking their progress, or those who hire a coach/trainer.  Both work.  People who show up at the gym with a vague sense of “I’m gonna ride the bike, hit some weights, then take a really long steam,” typically don’t last.  By now, you have done the work. You’ve figured out your pain, budget, balance sheet, and a plan … Now you have to implement the strategy, and this is where the fun begins!

About Lance Drucker ChFC, CLU

Lance Drucker is CEO and president of NYC-based Drucker Wealth Management, a wealth management firm specializing in financial issues that affect women. He’s the author of “How to Avoid Bag Lady Syndrome (BLS): A Strong Woman’s Guide to Financial Peace of Mind” and offers resources at www.DruckerWealth.com to empower women to make smart financial decisions. He graduated from SUNY Binghamton with degrees in Accounting & Finance, and soon after joined the firm Drucker Wealth Management, founded by his father in 1959. He earned his Chartered Financial Consultant (ChFC®) & his Chartered Life Underwriter (CLU®) degree in 1993, and in 2012, he received a Certificate in Retirement Income Planning from the Wharton School of Business. He is a multiyear winner of the 5 Star Wealth Manager Award, as well as a recipient of the Women’s Choice Award for Financial Advisors.  As a proud sponsor of the Wounded Warrior Project, Drucker organizes the Polar Bear Plunge fundraiser for the WWP every January and has participated in the Tough Mudder challenge, and Spartan Race, which has helped to fund more than $2 million for wounded warriors.

All proceeds from the sale of his book
will go toward the Wounded Warrior Project.

Fear-Free Money Plan

7 Steps To A Fear-Free Money Plan
Women Overwhelmed By Financial Worries Can Ease
Their Anxieties, Planner Says

Money worries can lead to sleepless nights for just about everyone, but surveys routinely reveal that women more than men feel the anxiety from a rocky financial situation.

In a 2014 Money Magazine survey, for example, two-thirds of women said they were worried about their financial outlook, compared with 54 percent of men.

Recent studies also found that women tend to be overwhelmed by debt more frequently than men, says financial strategist Donna M. Phelan, author of “Women, Money and Prosperity: A Sister’s Perspective on How to Retire Well” (www.donnamphelan.com).

They are more likely to carry over a credit card debt from one month to the next, as well as pay only the minimum required by their lender.

“That can lead to the misconception that women are bad with money, but that’s not necessarily the case,” Phelan says. “Emergencies arise. Children need school supplies. Elderly parents can need medication. The list can go on and on.”

Women don’t need to remain in perpetual state of anxiety, Phelan says. She offers seven tips for developing a fear-free plan of action:

•  Learn financial basics. Go online or to the library and read financial articles, books and newspapers. Also, Phelan says, seek the help of a financial advisor who can assess your situation, suggest ways to improve and create a financial plan that could get you on track for retirement.

“Many women avoid going to see a financial advisor because they don’t have any money or are deep in debt and believe they can’t afford it, but that’s precisely when you should see a financial advisor,” Phelan says.

•  Get organized. Rid yourself of clutter and set up systems to keep track of paperwork. If the task seems overwhelming, take it a step at a time, such as cleaning out just one desk drawer a week, Phelan says.

Balance your checkbook regularly, too. Do it weekly or bi-weekly if possible, Phelan suggests, but never go more than a month. “This isn’t a chore most people enjoy, but it’s necessary for a healthy budget,” she says.

•  Use cash instead of credit. Credit cards distance us from the effect purchases have on our bank accounts, at least until the bill arrives. “Cash, on the other hand, is an immediate reminder of the financial consequences of that purchase,” Phelan says. “Sometimes a reminder is a good thing.”

One away to wean yourself off credit is to carry and use your checkbook and leave the credit cards at home, Phelan says.

•  Track your spending. Write down everything you spend money on for one week, Phelan says. Then look in your checkbook and credit-card statements and write down everything you spend money on for one month. “You will be amazed at how much you spend and where the money goes,” she says.

The next step is to create a spending plan. Write down how much income you have each month and decide how you want to spend it. Pay yourself first, Phelan suggests, by saving a certain percentage each month. After that, list all your mandatory bills and find ways to cut non-essentials.

•  Look for ways to increase your income. When you can’t pay your bills each month, you have two options. Increase your income or reduce expenses. “It’s likely some combination of the two will be necessary,” Phelan says. “No matter how you view it, you need to start looking for ways to open up new income streams.”

•  Develop new retirement strategies. Women should create what Phelan refers to as Stackable Income Streams to Empower Retirement Security, or SISTERS. Essentially, they need to “stack” enough dependable income streams to meet their monthly spending needs in retirement. Women should consider non-traditional residence sharing, such as renting out empty rooms, getting a roommate or downsizing, she says. They could create profitable home-based businesses from their hobbies. Women should consider delaying their retirement start date and working part-time in retirement, Phelan says.

•  Talk with other women. What are your friends doing to better manage money and prepare for retirement? Phelan suggests women form a SISTERS club that meets regularly to discuss retirement planning. They might discover that they have ideas, talents and resources to share with other women, which might enhance the retirement planning experience and success of a larger scope of women.

About Donna M. Phelan

Donna M. Phelan is the author of “Women, Money and Prosperity: A Sister’s Perspective on How to Retire Well” (www.donnamphelan.com). Donna has spent 19 years at some of Wall Street’s largest and most prestigious investment firms. She holds an MBA in Finance from the University of Connecticut, and provides personal finance advice to clients in 20 states coast to coast. She has been featured in USA Today, Yahoo Finance.Com, CNBC.Com and The Houston Chronicle, among others. Donna has lectured at conferences nationwide on a broad range of financial topics and is the author of numerous articles on investments, retirement and financial planning. Donna was formerly President of the American Association of Individual Investors (AAII) Connecticut state chapter and was active in the Financial Women’s Association (FWA) in New York. She is currently a member of the South Bay Estate Planning Council in Los Angeles. Prior to working on Wall Street, Donna was Principal of a jewelry design and manufacturing company whose customers included Tiffany & Co, C. D. Peacock, and Cartier, for whom she did freelance design.

Book promo: The Confessions of a Librarian: A Memoir of Loves

In the spirit of such classic female erotic adventurers as Anais Nin, Erica Jong and Toni Bentley, Barbara Foster shares lurid details of worldly romantic encounters from Istanbul, Buenos Aries, Israel and back to New York. . . . sure to keep you rapidly turning pages.

Buy Link

5 Safety Tips For Women Traveling Alone
A Few Precautions Help Reduce Risks So You
Can Focus On Fun, Globetrotting Author Says

Perhaps more than ever, women are willing to ditch their traveling companions and go solo when it comes time to hit the road and see the world.

A survey by Small Luxury Hotels of the World, for example, revealed that between 2011 and 2012 there was a 53 percent increase in the demand for rooms by women traveling alone.

The London Daily Mail also reports that some hotels have taken steps to make their accommodations more appealing to women traveling on their own, with such features as women-only floors. 

Still, despite the trend, many women may worry that such solitary excursions carry too many risks, making them a target for thieves, kidnappers and other criminals.

But one woman who has logged endless miles exploring the world and finding romance says it doesn’t have to be that way.

“There is no reason to let your fears keep you from the adventures you can experience,” says Barbara Foster, a veteran globetrotter and author of the book “The Confessions of a Librarian: A Memoir of Loves.” (www.threelovestory.com)

“Sure, there are risky places and bad types out there. But with the right precautions, women can travel solo with confidence, visiting the places and meeting the people they always dreamed of and returning home with wonderful stories and memories.”

Foster speaks from experience. Her travels have taken her across the country and around the world, with stops in Istanbul, Bombay, Buenos Aires, Jerusalem and other locales.

As an adventurer, Foster is something of a contradiction. She describes herself as a librarian who has difficulty reading flight schedules, and suspects a haggling merchant in an Arab bazaar would view her as easy pickings.

He would be mistaken.

While Foster has spent a professional lifetime in academia, and co-authored books on such esoteric subjects as Tibetan Buddhism, she also is steeped in real-life experience.

Foster, who says solo trips can be deeply rewarding for women, offers five tips for traveling boldly while staying safe.

•  Steer clear of the most dangerous locales. Simply put, some places just aren’t worth the risk, so avoid “no go” neighborhoods, cities and countries. For example, if you feel compelled to go to the Middle East, visit Israel, which is the safest Middle Eastern country. Still, if the destination is truly important to you, go ahead and take the risk. India can be dangerous and Foster says she was nearly kidnapped there, saved only by the intervention of a librarian friend. At the same time, she says, the country offers a once in a lifetime experience.

•  Connect with friendly contacts. Make yourself known not only to the U.S. embassy or consul, but also to people in your field, Foster says. During her travels, Foster wrote articles about libraries she visited. Her fellow librarians were a protective group.

•  Learn the language or at least useful phrases. Even if it’s just a few key words, speaking the language can come in handy if you need to seek assistance. Understanding what others are saying also can alert you to potential dangers.

•  Dress wisely, pay attention to manners and spend money in moderation.Essentially, don’t draw unnecessary attention to yourself. In her book, Foster recounts a visit to Istanbul where she watched horror-struck as two Turkish men slapped a young British woman for wearing a miniskirt on the street. For added protection against thieves, Foster recommends carrying money and identification in a pouch under your shirt.

•  Travel in the USA. You will miss many of the world’s must-see places, but if the thought of traveling abroad holds too much stress for you, it might be better to stick closer to home. Foster says two of her favorite U.S. cities are New York and New Orleans, both great places to explore.

About Barbara Foster

Barbara Foster has worked as a college librarian and as an associate professor specializing in Women’s Studies at the City University of New York. She has published numerous articles on education and travel, as well as more than 200 poems in literary journals under the name Belladonna. Her latest book is “The Confessions of a Librarian: A Memoir of Loves.” (www.threelovestory.com)

The quest for financial independence

7 Steps for Addressing ‘Bag Lady Syndrome’ –
a Fear of Losing Financial Independence
Study Finds Even Wealthy Women Worry About
Becoming ‘The Best Dressed Bag Lady in Their Community’

Nearly half of all American women, no matter their background, share a fear that may seem odd given the wealth of some: They are afraid of losing their financial independence, otherwise known as “Bag Lady Syndrome,” according to a 2013 study.

Of those who harbor BLS anxiety, 60 percent were the primary breadwinners for their households, according to the Allianz poll of 2,200 women ages 25 to 75.

“Financially, women’s needs are different from those of men, and the financial industry isn’t meeting them,” says Lance Drucker, CEO and president of the New York City-based Drucker Wealth Management, (www.DruckerWealth.com).

“Women typically live longer than men, so they need more retirement savings.  Further compounding the problem is the fact that, in many cases, women are paid less for the same job as men. Finally, many have fewer earning years because they dropped out of the labor force for a time to have and raise their children.”

Drucker, author of “How to Avoid Bag Lady Syndrome (BLS): A Strong Woman’s Guide to Financial Peace of Mind,” offers seven action steps that women can do to address their financial insecurity:

•  Identify your pain as well as your goals. Answer the following questions: What keeps me up at night?  What worries me most about my money & my future? What do I want to do with the rest of my life? When can I afford to retire? Can I afford to stay retired? Can I travel, change careers, or go back to school?

•  Create a budget that includes fixed and variable monthly costs as well as one-time expenses. Based on your budget, start building a cash cushion that will cover six to nine months of fixed expenses. The ultimate goal of retirement planning is to create an income stream that is sustainable and will support your retirement needs.

•  Create a balance sheet of savings and investments. This includes your savings account, stocks, bonds, mutual funds, investment real estate, cash value life insurance, annuities, retirement accounts, individual retirement accounts, 401 (k) plans and other assets.  Then further break it down by pre-tax and post tax-accounts.

•  Review insurance coverage and needs. Are you supporting anyone else? Is there a need for Life Insurance?  Who will take care of you if you get sick?  Do you have Long Term Care Insurance? One mother can raise 10 kids, but 10 kids can’t take care of one mother… Younger and healthier women may be tempted to overlook the importance of this step, but failure to anticipate potential health issues can be very expensive.

•  Address your estate-planning needs. Do you have a will, a durable power of attorney or a health care proxy?  Have you updated your beneficiary designations on your retirement accounts?  Does it make sense to put your assets in a trust to avoid probate? Answers for these questions are important. 

•  Develop your investment strategy. Is there a purpose to your current investment approach, or are you just accumulating funds? We recommend something we call a “4 Bucket Approach to Purposeful Investing” that has been designed with the help of a Wharton Business School professor.

•  Hire a Coach. Studies have shown that those investors that utilize a high quality financial advisor feel more confident, optimistic, and significantly more likely to stick to their plan versus do-it-yourself investors. 

About Lance Drucker ChFC, CLU

Lance Drucker is CEO and president of NYC-based Drucker Wealth Management, a wealth management firm specializing in financial issues that affect women. He’s the author of “How to Avoid Bag Lady Syndrome (BLS): A Strong Woman’s Guide to Financial Peace of Mind” and offers resources at www.DruckerWealth.com to empower women to make smart financial decisions. He graduated from SUNY Binghamton with degrees in Accounting & Finance, and soon after joined the firm Drucker Wealth Management, founded by his father in 1959. He earned his Chartered Financial Consultant (ChFC®) designation in 1990 and his Chartered Life Underwriter (CLU®) degree in 1993, and in 2012, he received a Certificate in Retirement Income Planning from the Wharton School of Business. He is a multiyear winner of the 5 Star Wealth Manager Award, as well as a recipient of the Women’s Choice Award for Financial Advisors.  As a proud sponsor of the Wounded Warrior Project, Drucker organizes the Polar Bear Plunge fundraiser for the WWP every January & has participated in the Tough Mudder challenge, and Spartan Race, which has helped to fund more than $2 million dollars for wounded warriors.

Stress Free Styling Tips

Is Your Wardrobe Stressing You Out?
International Styling Consultant Shares
Confidence-Boosting Clothing Tips

As if there weren’t enough to worry about in day-to-day life, people often find themselves frozen in front of their closets during the morning rush, panicking about what to wear.

“I think everyone has that terrible feeling of insecurity from time to time when you just knowyou have on the wrong outfit – as if it’s not just your clothes that are frumpy and outdated, but you, too,” says styling consultant Ashley Martini, author of the new book, “Styletini,” and founding member of Martini Fashions, (www.ashleymartini.com).

“Unfortunately, in today’s society, people do judge books by their covers – and perception is reality. You can sense how people respond to you, especially in relation to job opportunities and relationships.”

Getting your outfit right can be challenging, she concedes. People want to be confident yet comfortable; up-to-date yet not necessarily “hipsteriffic;” professional but not overly formal. Most have a favorite outfit or two, but those get old quickly when worn twice a week.

“One of the first things you should understand is that your criteria really isn’t conflicting – you can be stylish, professional and comfortable, all with that stamp of individuality,” Martini says. “You just have to know what to look for.”

Martini talks tips to take the stress out of the morning dress hour.

•  Not all trends work for all body types. “You have to be honest with yourself; skinny jeans may not work for you, and forcing yourself into a pair that’s semi-workable is not the best way to optimize your closet,” she says. “The trendiest thing any individual can do is answer the question: Is it flattering?”

Women have six basic body types: triangle, narrow above the waist and wider on the bottom; inverted triangle, with fuller shoulders and chest and slim hips and thighs; rectangle, also known as athletic with little definition in the waist and hips; diamond, high-sitting, full stomach with wide hips and full thighs; apple, similar to diamonds, but with a lower-sitting stomach – also know as oval-shaped; hourglass, with equal upper and lower halves with well-defined waists.

•  Know your measurements! Measure the parts of your body that most define your shape: your hips, shoulders, waist and bust. Wear underwear (but not shapewear) when measuring hips, and wrap the tape around the fullest part of your hips and butt for the most accurate measurement. Don’t tug too tightly or loosely when measuring; the number in the center front is your hip size.
To measure shoulders, keep your back straight and your shoulders relaxed, and  extend the tape from the outer edge of one shoulder to the outer edge of the other.

To measure your waist, bend forward and note where your body creases – that’s where to measure.

For bust, wear a top without a bra, which often alters measurements. Wrap the tape across your back and under your shoulder blades and arms – and around the fullest part of your breasts.

•  Own your plus-size, petite or tall body. You’ve probably heard the statement, “Real women have curves.” Yes, they do, but there are also real women with smaller busts; long and lean women, and some built like the ancient fertility goddess statues. All of us are “real.”

One tip for plus-sized women: highlight your assets — shapely legs and well-toned arms are meant to be flaunted. Petite women: Opt for pieces that come in naturally shorter lengths, such as cigarette pants, knee-length or higher skirts and three-quarter and shorter sleeve tops and jackets. Showing more skin will make your limbs look longer. Tall women: Wear high heels if you want to — just because you’re taller doesn’t mean they’re off limits.

About Ashley Martini

Ashley Martini, styling consultant and founding member of Martini Fashions, LLC, discreetly assists both men and women in unearthing and exhibiting their inner beauty through style, fashion and the top trends. Ashley is the author of the new book on style, “Styletini,” (www.ashleymartini.com). A business graduate of Lynn University, she specialized in fashion marketing and merchandising. She also completed her master’s degree in business with a focus on international business, and studied abroad in the world’s fashion capital, Paris, with a concentration in fashion styling and trend forecasting. She worked as a styling intern with Jennifer Lopez’s fashion company Sweetface/JustSweet/JLO, and earned numerous fashion awards.