It’s a Brave New World

…and I applaud the writers of Harry’s Law for challenging the assumptions of RAPE in tonight’s episode (And the Band Played On). Among the finer points (and I apologize if this is a little too brutal), it was stated CLEARLY that rape is not always a stranger holding a woman down at knifepoint  – it CAN be date rape, a man can be victimized, and at times the victim can even climax and it doesn’t mean they enjoyed it. The show’s characters even had some debates amongst themselves. It was a very interesting episode.

Bartlett’s Rule is a love story. When I wrote it my intention was to challenge the assumptions made about rape. Paige was raped by someone she knew and trusted and even the hero of the story, Lon, has to “wrap his head” around the concept. It all comes down to CONSENT.

In the real world many good and caring people have had to rethink their attitudes. As we wind down to the end of April, Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM) I encourage everyone to continue healthy discussions about respect, sexuality and consent. Talk to each other. Talk to your kids.

For resources to help guide you, please refer to the Sexual Assault Awareness Month website. Click around for fact sheets and discussion starters. A bit of knowledge goes a long way.

Bartlett’s Rule by Chelle Cordero
Buy Links

Amazon (print)

Amazon (Kindle)

BarnesandNoble (print)

BarnesandNoble (NOOK)

multiple ebook formats (Smashwords)

Honoring The National Domestic Violence Hotline

Vanilla Heart Publishing and Chelle Cordero will donate $1 per copy of Bartlett’s Rule sold from midnight October 18, 2009 through midnight October 31, 2009 to The National Domestic Violence Hotline, to further their amazing work.

Bartlett’s Rule ISBN 978-0-9796545-3-4
print from Amazon
print from Barnes & Noble
various eBook formats from Smashwords
Kindle from Amazon
* more sources are available

Why Bartlett’s Rule?

Reviewed by Bobi

When Paige and Lon met it was purely for business but it wasn’t long before their hearts took control. Paige’s past comes back to haunt them and they soon come to realize that the devastating effects of rape and abuse extend beyond time and place to impact more than the primary victim herself. Lon has to grapple with his own intense anger and hurt over Paige’s assault. He also has to overcome mis-perceptions of his personal character while building a foundation of trust between himself and Paige.

Ms. Cordero skillfully tackles this topic as she poignantly tells the story of their journey to heal and develop a relationship based on strong reliance.

Bartlett’s Rule is more than a love story; it relates a valuable lesson for both men and women.

*The inclusion of links and/or information about National Domestic Violence Hotline constitutes no endorsement from said organization.

http://www.ndvh.org/

~~~~~

Preventing Abuse – Interview with Chelle Cordero – Author of Bartlett’s Rule

I’ll be joining Jeanine Swatton on SWATTON LIVE to discuss my novel, Bartlett’s Rule. This is a story of a woman recovering from the devastating effects of rape while she learns to trust and fall in love again. The story explores the secondary victim challenges facing the man she meets (after the rape) and the effects on people around them.

Please join us at 9PM EST, Oct 28 at http://bit.ly/16ZF8M

“Chelle Cordero will join us in discussing her novel, Bartlett’s Rule. This is a story of a woman recovering from the devastating effects of rape while she learns to trust and fall in love again. The story explores the secondary victim challenges facing the man she meets (after the rape) and the effects on people around them.”

Jeanine Swatton is the CEO/PR Director of Swatton Live, LLC. She is the co-founder of “Preventing Abuse Against Women”. Jeanine holds a Master’s degree in Computer Science from Boston University. Her vision is to help women who are victims of abuse and provide them with the services and tools to become empowered.

*****

About the "new" Bartlett’s Rule – pass it around

Bartlett’s Rule, originally published by Vanilla Heart Publishing in April, 2008, was just re-released with a new cover – but there is more than just a new face. In the back of the book is an expanded resource section with helpful information about sexual abuse…

Bartlett’s Rule shares the story of Lon and Paige’s love affair; a romance filled with hardship, emotion, danger and triumph. Falling in love was never the challenge; being there for each other, knowing just what to say and making it work is the real test. Paige and Lon are real ; they are human, they cry and they laugh. Paige has to learn to trust. Lon has to learn to be patient.

Paige Andrews, the heroine of the fictional tale Bartlett’s Rule, is a rape survivor. Paige and her hero, Lon Bartlett, have to learn to love and trust each other despite her past and his womanizing reputation.

Emotional First Aid for Survivors
1) Anything and everything you experience is normal. Your reactions, feelings and experiences are all valid, you are not going crazy. You have the right to express your feelings in any way you want or need.
2) The rape was not your fault. You are not responsible for what happened to you in any way. You have nothing to be ashamed about.
3) It’s time you take care of yourself. You definitely deserve it. You are a valuable person and deserve the best life has to offer. You need to come first, so do whatever makes you feel better.
4) No matter what anyone says, you are a good, strong woman.
5) Other people may hurt or disappoint you. They do not understand how you feel. Disregard anything hurtful.
6) You are not dirty or used or damaged.
7) You are safe, the rape is over.
8) You are not alone. There are people ready and willing to help (friends, family, social workers, women’s shelters and other resources are always readily available to you.).
9) Hang in there. It may become difficult at times, but you will survive. You already have survived the worst.
10) YOU HAVE DONE NOTHING WRONG. Place the blame where it belongs. And, remember: You are a good, strong, beautiful, wonderful person.
(Source: YWCA: Richmond, VA)

Online Support and Information Groups
National Women’s Health Information Center
http://www.4woman.gov/faq/sexual-assault.cfm
Pandora’s Aquarium
http://www.pandys.org/forums/
Surviving the Memories
http://survivingthememories.tripod.com/
Escaping Hades
http://escapinghades.pandys.org/index2.html
Safe Horizon
http://www.safehorizon.org/

Buy Bartlett’s Rule

other helpful books:

A Guide to Survivorhood by Namid

Secondary Survivors by Namid

Bartlett’s Rule Book Club Discussion Topics

Bartlett’s Rule shares the story of Lon and Paige’s love affair; a romance filled with hardship, emotion, danger and triumph. Falling in love was never the challenge; being there for each other, knowing just what to say and making it work is the real test. Paige and Lon are “real”; they are human, they cry and they laugh. Paige has to learn to trust. Lon has to learn to be patient.

From the introduction:
When Paige Andrews is given the assignment of courting a famous writer for the publishing company she works for, she meets and entices the sexy, charming and thoroughly dangerous womanizer, Lon Bartlett.

Lon immediately takes a not-so-professional, personal interest in the young woman and pursues her. Lon is thrilled when Paige finally succumbs to his charms only to find that her haunting past sets off a terrifying reaction. Lon learns a heartbreaking reality – Paige is a rape survivor.

Will Lon be able to change his womanizing ways? Will he want to? Will Paige ever learn to trust again? Can they learn to love and live, together?

Discussion Starters for Bartlett’s Rule by Chelle Cordero

1. How does Bartlett’s Rule explore the two distinct personalities of the main characters?
2. Discuss how the different personalities emerge in the beginning of the novel. Do these personalities stay constant?
3. How much do you think society’s expectations influenced Lon towards building his reputation as a player?
4. What pressures does society place on men in relationships? How different are those pressures now in 2008 as opposed to, let’s say, the 1950’s?
5. Lon admits he has to rethink his view of rape when he learns that Paige was raped by an ex-lover and not a stranger with a weapon. Discuss different concepts of what is rape, what is sexual abuse?
6. Have a discussion about Paige’s emotional scars and the trust she felt was betrayed. Should Paige “just get over it”? How realistic are some of her reactions? Was Paige allowing herself to move ahead? Discuss Lon’s support of her.
7. Hal attempts to blame people like Lon for the way he treated Paige. How does TV/music/movies/novels affect actions and at what point is the individual responsible for his/her own actions? For example, courtroom dramas like to blame the influence of TV, etc. for today’s violence.
8. Some TV/radio/print personalities enjoy an almost cult following and are considered “experts” in their various fields. Discuss some of these self-proclaimed “experts”: Dr. Ruth, Oprah, Dr. Phil, Geraldo, etc. Do these ‘stars’ sensationalize rape? How so?
9. How do you think you would feel if your private life, particularly romance, was scrutinized by the paparazzi? How much does a public figure owe to the public and fans in terms of privacy? How much does the media have the right to report?

Buy Bartlett’s Rule from Amazon

Bartlett’s Rule is also available as an E-Book

ADDITIONAL SUGGESTED READING

To Dance Amongst the Stars – A Journey of Healing and Hope by Namid
To Dance Amongst the Stars is written to share the author’s trials and triumphs of surviving and overcoming a lifetime of sexual abuse and abusive relationships, in the hopes that other abused women can find strength and hope in her story.
The very personal and extremely empowering tone and style is definitely meant to share the struggle and the resolutions for anyone who has been abused or loves someone who is a survivor of abuse.
The author says, “I used my own experience to reach out to other rape survivors. The wording may not be the most flowery, but I hope that by reading my experience in going through the healing process, others can begin to heal. I hope that people can draw something good from my experiences.”
$12.95 ISBN-13: 978-0-9814739-4-9 Vanilla Heart Publishing

A Guide to Survivorhood: Your Personal Journey of Healing and Hope by Namid
This workbook will help guide survivors and the people who love them through the often difficult journey to regain empowerment and self-esteem after sexual assault. Loaded with guided exercises, examples, resources, and discussions, the workbook gives the survivor the tools to rebuild a happy, whole and healthy self.
$12.95 ISBN-13: 978-0-9814739-9-7 Vanilla Heart Publishing

Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson
Melinda Sordino suffers through her freshman year at Merryweather High School in silence. Gradually, readers become aware that Melinda is spiraling out of control as she becomes mute and loses interest in herself, her family, and school. Why? She was raped at a party…
$8.99 ISBN: 9780141310886 Puffin

The Story of Jane Doe: a Book About Rape by Jane Doe
“The Story of Jane Doe is a startling document about a woman who was not willing to play the standard role of victim, a woman who brought attention to how rape was being handled by the police force, the legal system and, more important, by society. I found this book to be a thoroughly engrossing, intelligent account of rape, and I must say quite an eye-opener to boot.” — The Edmonton Journal”
ISBN 978-0-6793127-5-8 Random House of Canada, Limited

from the back of Bartlett’s Rule

Paige Andrews, the heroine of the fictional tale Bartlett’s Rule, is a rape survivor. Paige and her hero, Lon Bartlett, have to learn to love and trust each other despite her past and his womanizing reputation.

Rape is a very real and tragic occurence. That is why, at the end of the story, I included a fact sheet (information courtesy of RAINN)

~Chelle

A FEW FACTS ABOUT RAPE AND SEXUAL ASSAULT

Every two and a half minutes, somewhere in America, someone is sexually assaulted.

Rape: Rape is forced sexual intercourse, including vaginal, anal or oral penetration. Penetration may be by a body part or an object.
Rape victims may be forced through threats or physical means. In about 8 out of 10 rapes, no weapon is used other than physical force. Anyone may be a victim of rape: women, men or children, straight or gay.

Sexual assault: Sexual assault is unwanted sexual contact that stops short of rape or attempted rape. This includes sexual touching and fondling. (But, be aware: Some states use this term interchangeably with rape.)

Incest: Incest is sexual contact between persons who are so closely related that their marriage is illegal (e.g., parents and children, uncles/aunts and nieces/nephews, etc.). This usually takes the form of an older family member sexually abusing a child or adolescent.

Approximately 73% of rape victims know their assailant, according to the 2005 National Crime Victimization Survey
Approximately 38% of victims are raped by a friend or acquaintance;
26% of victims by a stranger;
28% of victims by an intimate;
7% of victims by another relative;
in 2% of cases the relationship is unknown.

If you have been sexually assaulted, there may be medical concerns that arise both immediately following the assault and much later. If you were sexually assaulted recently, it’s a good idea to go to a doctor to be checked out for possible injuries or complications.

All the statistics and information above are courtesy of RAINN, the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network.

For more information and help, go to http://www.rainn.org/ or call 1.800.656.HOPE (4673)

To purchase Bartlett’s Rule

Customer Review of Bartlett’s Rule from Amazon.com

Bartlett’s Rule, May 11, 2008
By Barbara Moroch

A fantastic read — a love story between two seemingly very different kinds of people. Between all the tribulations that get in the way of their romance, they ultimately triumph. The story is so well crafted and the characters evoke lots of emotion from the reader. The plot takes lots of twists and turns and underscores the severity of rape crimes and the lasting damage it inflicts upon its victims. I look forward to reading the author’s second novel, “Forgotten.” Its preview seems to be as captivating as this book was!

Amazon.com